Price determination of know-how

Give Me A Gift and Enjoy Today.  October 14, 2011 – 09:26 am
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My birthday, the day I was officially born, is November 12th.
My kids birthdays are in May and August.
I have another daughter. She was stillborn July 15th.
My re-birthday, the day I consider myself reborn, is that same day.

10 years ago today I vowed in the hospital room, as my body shut down with a kind of preeclampsia that kills quickly and suddenly, that I was not going to lose my daughter still connected to me via umbilical cord, placenta, and strong deep emotions. “Over my dead body! Over my dead body!” I repeated like a mantra as I lost touch with reality and found my focus constricting down into one moment, one breath, two heartbeats.

Barely into my last trimester, I knew it was too early for her. They induced labor to save my life but all I wanted was to keep hers going.

The room got dark and I couldn’t see anymore while at the same time my inner vision got brighter and brighter. I don’t know how to explain it other than I was blind to the outside but my vision was getting blindingly white. It was like staring at the sun and then reaching a point where you realize you will either go blind or need to shield your eyes. “Over my dead body!” I thought one last time, and the thought occurred to me that if I kept looking at the light that’s exactly what would happen. I thought of my two young kids, then 6 and 3, and it was like a mental eye shielding. My focus turned to them, and away from my not quite born yet daughter. It felt like I’d switched off a light switch…the light got dark again. In the following moments she was stillborn. My blood pressure, astronomically high at 210/190, took over a year to stabilize. I had other lingering health issues that took some time to work out. But, I was alive.

Source: My CMS

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Book (Gale ECCO, Print Editions)

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